Recovery from pornography addiction, any addiction in fact, is a process. At Dirty Girls Ministries, we want to come alongside you through a recovery process made up of five steps: Surrender, Confession, Accountability, Responsibility and Sharing.
You might have noticed that these steps spell out the word S.C.A.R.S. They are adapted from our founder Crystal Renaud’s book, Dirty Girls Come Clean and were inspired by the events of John 20. Just as Christ’s scars proved to Thomas that He was the risen Messiah, the scars left behind from our wounds will prove God’s healing in us.
If you are new here, you will want to begin at Surrender.
Behavior modification doesn’t work without first surrendering control of our behavior over to God. In order to heal, we must first restore our view of God and believe He is able to do all things. Have you accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior? If you haven’t, this is your opportunity. It doesn’t take a big production. Just your open heart and a simple prayer (click here for more info).
As part of your first step, we also encourage to take this opportunity to complete our Personal Inventory. Before we can break free from these addictions, we need to admit our true condition and know exactly where we are. That is where this Personal Inventory comes in. This inventory is lengthly, but it is important that you answer as many questions thoroughly and as honestly as possible. So begin the inventory when you have time enough to complete it. As you honestly work your way through the inventory, keep in mind these four essential elements of pornography addiction recovery:
• First, understanding the seriousness of sexual sin.
• Second, evaluating where you are vulnerable to sexual sin.
• Third, confessing honestly where you have messed up.
• And last, committing to sexual purity from this day forward.
In order, your next step is Confession.
For those of you struggling with an addiction of a sexual nature, you’ve likely never told anyone about your struggles. As women, we believe we’re the only ones struggling in this way. And addiction LOVES isolation. But confession brings light and a sense of community. And it just so happens that a community is exactly what we have here at DGM. As a member of DGM, you will be able to join our free online community consisting of over 2,500 members. Why is membership required? Confidentiality and the protection of our ladies from outside lurkers is of utmost importance to us. Membership helps to ensure only those who are serious about recovery gain access. This should give you peace of mind about your own participation.
*CLICK HERE TO ENROLL IN DGM MEMBERSHIP*
Your struggle with sexual sin is common to so many other women. It is so common, in fact, that in a survey recently conducted by Dirty Girls Ministries in partnership with Today’s Christian Woman, 40% of Christian women admitted to being addicted to porn and 68% of those admitted they used porn to masturbate. Which is why the step of confession is so important! When we confess, we break the power of shame. When we confess, we break down walls of isolation. When we confess, we break the lie that we’re the only one. And when we cry out to God in confession in times of temptation, we are promised a way out.
The remaining steps are Accountability, Responsibility and Sharing.
For the best insight on how these steps should be accomplished, it is recommended that once you’re in our community, for you to join or begin facilitating a MeetAbility group to work through Dirty Girls Come Clean. However, for the Accountability step, our Accountability Discussion & Reflection Guide is a great tool for reflecting on your addiction condition with a friend/accountability partner/counselor. More information about how this guide can be used can be found on the guide link itself.
Responsibility is about making direct and indirect amends as it relates to how your addiction has affected other people. And finally, Sharing is allowing God to use your story in a redemptive way through helping other women (again, this could be by facilitating a group, sharing your story at church, etc.). We can never stop sharing our victory stories. To God to the Glory!